Each of the one hundred million people (that's just a wild guess) who play golf fit into one of three categories. The 3 categories are: a) the extremely casual golfer, b) the casual golfer, and c) the avid golfer.
The "extremely casual player" is best described as someone who rarely plays, usually rents clubs, and seems to think that they need to get down on both hands and knees to put a tee in the ground. The "casual player" is someone who plays a dozen times a year or so, attends the odd PGA Tour event, and often comes back from the course smelling like a fraternity carpet. Lastly, the "avid golfer," who many non-golfers would describe as "a very sick individual," is someone who has a personalized golf related license plate and has most likely traded his children for a golfing membership.
Unfortunately, due to personal bias, prejudice towards certain golfing groups, or basic retardation, it can sometimes be difficult to determine which category you belong in. In order for you to set the record straight, you need to take "Are You An Avid Golfer?" test. Add up your points at the end to determine your category.
Question #1.
I'll quit a round of golf when…
Question #2.
After tallying up my front nine score and realizing that it is a personal worst I…
Question #3.
If my playing partner keels over on the front nine from a heart attack I will…
Question #4.
My golf instructional material consists of…
Question #5.
I take golf lessons…
Question #6.
If I show up at the golf course without a tee time and the course is jammed I…
Question #7.
I'll teach my kids the fundamentals of the game when…
Question #8.
When money is really tight and a friend asks me to go to Kiawah Island golfing I…
Question #9.
When I'm asked to go to the store to buy bread and milk I…
Question #10.
I'll watch The Golf Channel…
Your Score:
10-15 points = Casual Player
16-25 points = Semi-Casual Player
26-40 points = Avid Player (make sure the divot repair tool is sharp).
Andrew Penner is a freelance writer and photographer based in Calgary, Alberta. His work has appeared in newspapers and magazines throughout North America and Europe. You can see more of his work at www.andrewpenner.com.
We all love golf course rankings, but there's quite a bias involved, huh? Host a major championship and you're basically guaranteed a spot on the list. What about the average duffer who's more impressed with the beer list than the slope/rating - or prefers friendliness over the fine, imported lotion in the locker room? Where's our list, hackers? Answer: Right here.
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