Golf Jokes » Golf excuses

Excuses when you just have to go play golf!

The Cubs missed the playoffs, so my afternoons are free.

The doctor ordered me to get lots of fresh air.

The doctor recommended I golf every day...I think that's what he said.

The doctor said after getting an injection, I must keep my arms loose. Golfing is the best thing.

The doctor said running is bad, but walking with golf clubs is OK.

The driving range is closed, so I have to practice somewhere.

The fairways are like greens, and the greens are like velvet. I just have to play it.

The fish are not biting this time of year.

The forecast is for snow; we need to play as much as possible today.

The golf course is the only place I can get my entire family together.

The golf course is the only place I get good customer service.

The golf course is where I write my books.

The golf course serves the best canned beer in the city.

The grass is too wet to cut, so I might as well just go golfing.

The greenskeeper just planted new flowers.

The humidity is low, so won't sweat.

The IT department won't be able to fix the server till next Monday, so we are taking the week off.

The junkyard didn't have the part I needed, but it was next to a course I haven't played in years.

The lawn mower is broken.

The leaves are changing colours.

The movers are packing my house. I have nothing else to do.

The new rakes for traps are supposed to allow the ball to fly out of the sand easier.

The phone lines are down at work.

The pool is closed, so I'm going golfing.

The practice are has a sand trap.

The rain has blown through, and the sun is shining.

The rough is real playable on the course.

The sky is the perfect shade of blue.

The smoke looks so cool on the pond in front of the first tee box.

The softball game was rained out.

The speed of play on this course is excellent.

The stormed knocked out the electricity, so the office is closed.

The sun is shining.

The superintendent just replaced all the sand in the traps.

The union at work furloughed me, so now I have free time.

The voices in my head told me to go golfing.

The weather for next month is for rain; I need to get in as much golf as possible.

The weather has been so bad lately, I want to take advantage of the sunny weather.

The weather is beautiful.

The wind is blowing out of the south; I may be able to par the number one handicap hole.

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