Golf Jokes » ReligionThe Fortune Teller
Golfer:
"Are there golf courses in Heaven?"
Fortune
Teller: "I have good news, and I have bad news..." Golfer:
"What's the good news?" Fortune
Teller: "The good news is that Heaven's golf courses are beautiful
beyond anything you could imagine!"
Golfer: "How could there be any bad news with that?" Fortune
Teller: "You have a tee-time at 8:30 tomorrow morning." 1 Iron
A
rather good golf junkie who happens to be a priest is on the 18th
hole and has about a 200 yard approach shot to the green. He drags
out his 1-iron, and starts to swing at the ball. Suddenly, the clouds
overhead let out a flash of lightning and a massive roll of thunder,
shattering a tree some 3 hundred yards east, and the rain begins
pouring down in a blinding sheet.
The distraction causes him to hook the shot badly out of bounds.
He waves his 1-iron at the clouds, screaming and yelling and cursing
God. His caddy runs up, grabs his club arm and yanks it down, yelling
``Are you crazy? You don't wave a club around like that in a thunderstorm!''
The priest looks at his caddy and says
``Phhhhhtt. Not even God can hit a 1-iron!''. Keeping your head down
A
young man is playing golf with a priest. At a short hole the priest
asks, "What are you going to use on this hole son?" A sin to play on Sunday
After
church one Sunday, one of the congregants walked up to the priest
and said, "Father, is it a sin to play golf on Sunday? What does that mean
A
rabbi and a priest go golfing with the club pro and his friend.
Before the friend gets up to hit the ball, he crosses himself. With
that the rabbi leans over to the priest to ask, What's your handicap
A
minister went to the local golf course hoping to find someone to
play with. As luck would have it, there was a member in the pro
shop looking for a game, so they were introduced and went to the
first tee. Deal with the devil
A
golfer is in a competitive match with a friend, who is ahead by
a couple of strokes. The golfer says to himself, "I'd give anything
to sink this next putt." Did you cheat your wife ?
Three
golfers are standing at the gates of heaven and St. Peter asked
them if they ever cheated while playing golf with their wives. Golfing with nuns
A
man wants to play golf, but shows up at the golf course by himself.
The starter groups him with 3 ladies, currently on the first hole.
Upon walking up to the tee, the man sees the three ladies are nuns.
He thinks to himself, "I gotta watch my p's and q's!" Everyone introduces
everyone else on the first tee and one of the nuns says to the man,
"Go ahead sir! You're up." Your hole
Joe
and his priest are playing in a golf match. Joe's game is perfect
that day, and he is giving the priest a thorough drubbing. The priest
can only sigh as he fills in the scorecard from the last hole. |