Golf Jokes » Golf excuses

The wind may help me reach the par-5's in two.

The yardage has all been remarked.

There are a lot of cool frogs near the ponds.

There are excellent fairway bunkers on this course.

There is a traffic jam, so I might as well play nine instead of sitting in traffic.

There is an opportunity to see OJ on the course.

There is beautiful swan watching on the fairways.

There is nothing else to do in Northern Wisconsin.

There is nothing like a long, slow walk in nature, with no one in front of me.

They are fumigating my office, so I have to find something to do this afternoon.

They are giving away free golf tees with every nine holes purchased.

They are having an open house on my home, so I have to find something to do.

They are offering 18 holes for the price of 9.

They are offering a free round of golf with a nights stay at this hotel; I'm considering moving in permanently.

They clean my clubs after the round is over.

They didn't promote me at work, so I am taking as much time off as possible.

They don't make you rake the traps at this course.

They gave me free greens fees because it was so slow last week.

They give out free peanuts at the turn.

They have a great microbrewery at the clubhouse.

They have really soft toilet paper at the golf course.

They have the best driving range.

They installed rain guards on the back of the carts to keep my clubs dry.

They just got all new range balls.

They just replaced the rye with bluegrass in the fairways.

They put in a new sand trap on the long par-5 fairway.

They put in a nursery at the clubhouse, so I can have them baby-sit and me golf!

They put new tee boxes on the par-5's.

They say the greens are tough in Myrtle. I have to try it for myself.

This course has the best sand traps.

This course offers free caddies with each round purchased.

This new course has valet parking.

Those new thin tees allow me to hit my drive an extra 10 yards.

Tomorrow is ladies day, so I have to get out today.

We are having the family reunion at the golf course.

We lost electricity in our house.

We might play a links course; I wouldn't have to see any other golfers.

What else am I supposed to do on vacation - spend time with the kids?

What else would I do on vacation.