Golf Jokes » Golf excuses

I've been practising at the range every day. I need to see how I will do with a real course.

I've never golfed in Scotland.

I've only played 12 rounds this week; I need lucky 13.

Last time I was out, I had a hole in one. I couldn't finish the round because I was so excited.

Last week I almost broke 100. I have to keep trying.

Monday Night Football moved back to 9.00pm, so I have the entire evening.

My back hurts, so I'm going golfing.

My back is finally feeling better.

My best friend is taking me golfing for my bachelor party.

My boss wants me to play in a scramble.

My broker offered to take me.

My brother-in-law has a layover on his way east, so I thought we could catch up while playing nine.

My buddy is the starter, and he sneaks me on the course for free.

My car is being fixed, again!

My carpet at home just doesn't break like a real green.

My cell phone is out of range at that course, so my boss can't reach me.

My chiropractor has cracked my back, allowing me to extend my follow-through.

My college roommate is in town, and it's the only thing we have in common.

My company sponsored an event, and I was asked to play.

My dad always pays when we go.

My doctor instructed me to take up a non-stressful sport!

My doctor told me to walk as much as possible. I might as well walk from the cart to my ball.

My dog ran away and he always goes to the golf course.

My e-mail is down at the office.

My father asked me to teach him, again!

My father's will stated I had to spend the money on green fees!

My flight cancelled, so I need to kill a few hours.

My friend keeps telling me it's fun.

My game is starting to come together, and I need to keep sharp.

My girlfriend asked me to get out of the house for a few hours.

My girlfriend bought me a perspiration-free golf shirt.

My girlfriend went out with her friends.

My girlfriend went to the movies, and I need to kill a few hours.

My girlfriend's grandma cooks such good meals; the course is the only place to walk off the meal.

My golf pro said I have to go at least once a day.

My grandfather taught me to golf and I want to keep his legacy going.

My grandma instructed me to go.

My horse is sick, so polo is out of the question for today.

My hose is broken so I can't wash the car, I might as well go golfing.